This just in! Google and Tesco have officially taken over the world. Without anyone noticing, google and tesco have been quietly buying out every other business on the planet. This week internet giant Google, have purchased Youtube for $1.65Billion, beating Msn, Yahoo and News Corp to the table. Google now own 99% of all internet related businesses, whilst Tesco continue to dominate 90% of all off-line businesses.
Tesco have reported that their profits are reaching $2.21Billion, annually. And they turnover roughly Â£70 a second, And this figure continues to grow as they dominate more of our world. Tesco now control all petrol, all supermarkets, all schools, all restaurants etc etc etc. We havenâ€™t seen it happening but the takeover is now nearly complete. Fast food giant’s McDonalds today announced;
“We just had to sell our business to Tesco, we tried to compete but after they had bought BK, KFC, subway and slashed the prices, we just couldnâ€™t make a profit”
Google today announced that they are now looking to buy Tesco, so that they not only control al the internet, but they also control everything off the internet. Googles chief spokesman had this to say;
“We do not want to take over the world; we just want to control it. We believe that everybody should be watched over and have their files and personal things searched through, to ensure the security of our great nations. Our recent internet takeover is just the start. The internet will be renamed to the Googlenet, and all other search engines will be shut down and diverted to google. The futures bright, the future belongs to us.”
He then left in a Jetcar and flew to the Bahamas.
Is this the end for the internet?
Is this the end of the world?
Could me and ste possibly of been discussing a more far out topic earlier on today?
No, I think not 😆
6 replies on “Google/Tesco World Takeover!”
Ooooh – I think Google and Tecso should join forces and take over the Labour Pary! THAT could be interesting….. 🙂
I think google should buy maxxd.com off me for Â£2.5billion
hahaha… yeah i wish!
The end of the world is nigh!!!!
All hail the google gods!
I bow before your holiness and powerfullnessness!
i’m No.1 on google! All hail google!
That’s fricking awesome 😀
Made me laugh anyway. I’ve been thinking the same for a while. I still think Wal Mart (ASDA) are bigger than Tesco overall. I’d love to see a battle between them. I wonder which one will buy the other…