Category: My Past

Today is the day we get our new modified car magazine delivered. Maxxd.info is the New Modified Car Enthusiast Magazine from us guys at Maxxd.

This weekend is gonna be the biggest weekend in the life of MMS.

If this weekend goes right, then the rest of the life of the mag and probably MMS is secured. Yes, it is that important!

We have to pick up a van later, and the mags and marquees and all sorts. Hopefully we wont forget anything!

Wish us luck!

P.s spok, your sister has joined maxxd.com! Haha! Small world! 🙂

I possibly have the worst memory ever. I forget to call in at my dads on the way home from work. I forget what i want as soon as i reach the top of my stairs – and i ALWAYS forget about April Fools Day.

Not this year!!!!

I remembered about it a few weeks ago, and set a shit load of reminders on my phone. First i set a week long reminder that would stay on my screen all week. Then i set an alarm for 7:00am on April Fool Day Morning. The alarm was even set to remind me WHAT to prank people, thats how bad my memory is!

Anyway, the morning came round and i was woken by my phone alarm as planned. I snoozed it and went back to sleep. I then sat up in bed a hour or so later, and started the fun.

First off, i told my Mum she was going to be a grandma – She shit frisbees and was crying on the phone to my aunty etc. My mum knows i dont want kids yet, and having them now would bugger up all my life plans. She then cottened on as it was my other aunites birthday on april fools, and they mentioned that they’d have to inform her – when all of a sudden the penny dropped! I wasnt the most loved of sons that day!!

I told my mate Kiss she was gonna be an aunty!  – She belived me too! Hahaha bless her she knows i want to travel n stuff too, and rang me and kind of said “Congratulations” but SO didnt mean it! Haha..

I told dave i quit, and that i was going back to full time employment – he believed be for about 5 seconds then cottoned on.

I told daz they had legalised weed – he thought i was telling the truth, until he realised what day it was later on in the day.

I told HSB that i had been given loads of MaryJ for free, and he could have a Oz. He belived me too! When he asked about collecting it, i said fetch it next april fools day! He then said he’d figured i was tricking him, and was gonna re-trick me later by saying he’d been in a huge car crah on the way to fetch it – whatever HSB! 😛

I think thats about it to be honest. Deffo a fun day, but i was really gutted that i upset my mum so much. I went round later and said sorry to her face!

If i had decided to have babies, then i think id of told my mum in person, not over a text at 8:30am on a sunday morning!

Went to thoresby market on sunday too, its a ace place – i got a cool grinder and a MINT teeshirt! – I will post pics soon 🙂

The same damm things, make my hair turn grey…

I have just had a phone call, gem hasnt got any cash left till she gets paid on friday, and i havent got enough money to go down and see her. Im gutted.

This is the first time she’s not been able to get down to my house (or visa versa) since we have started going out with each other – and i dont like it. 🙁
I guess it gives me some time alone, although when im alone all i do is think about the business and my life. And i just get stressed out.

I might take my camera phone out with me tongiht, and go for a walk. I live on the edge of mansfield so i dont have to walk far to find some nice scenary.

i hate writing blog entries when i feel like this, as i bet they all sound so repetative! Sorry!

Entry over, im out…

My mum and dad split up when i was 6 years old. Now, many people blame their fat-ness or depression on things like parent splitting up, but to be honest i didnt see it as a problem. My parents still got on with each other, they just drifted apart.

But i dont know wether or not that has meant the relationship with my father never realy developed properly. (i only saw him at weekends, and then only when he was waking me up, giving me food or taking me home) He was always there for me, and made sure i did right instead of wrong, but there seemed to be something lacking in his fatherhood that i think is starting to show through now.

I feel really uncomfortable/un-noticed sometimes when i go round to his house, i feel like he has no faith or doesnt really trust me to do the things i say im gonna do. And its like hes not even realy that bothered about the things i say – im very good at analysing people (not good at spelling tho) and i can tell that the things i talk about dont even sink in – he just nods and then gets distracted and pays his attention to someone or something else.

Now, there is nothing wrong with him taking the grandad role with his new family, as he does it really well.. I just feel that if i had a son that he’d be the most important thing in my life..
Its probably all my fault, i have been so useless with money, and as i was kicked out at 18 ive had to learn from my own mistakes for years and years. And i bet they are starting to get pissed off bailing me out. That go’s for my mum too. I darent ever ask my mum or dad for a bit of money, even just £10 – as they have bailed me out hundreds of times, and its always about money.

Even now, i sit here – £17 to my name PANICING as i have no idea how i am going to make it through this weekend, but i wont ask anyone for help cos im scared they’ll go mad.

I cant wait for the day where im older, and money just isnt the first problem that crops up in every situation i encounter. I dont want to be rich, honestly, i just want to not have to worry about money.

I guess im just being a mardy little attention seeking bitch. But its how i feel.